For Love Of Money

By The O’Jays

"Money money money money, money
Some people got to have it
Some people really need it
Listen to me y'all, do things, do things, do bad things with it
You wanna do things, do things, do things, good things with it
Talk about cash money, money
Talk about cash money- dollar bills, yall

For the love of money
People will steal from their mother
For the love of money
People will rob their own brother

For the love of money
People can't even walk the street
Because they never know who in the world they're gonna beat
For that lean, mean, mean green
Almighty dollar, money

For the love of money
People will lie, Lord, they will cheat
For the love of money
People don't care who they hurt or beat

For the love of money
A woman will sell her precious body
For a small piece of paper it carries a lot of weight

Almighty dollar

I know money is the root of all evil
Do funny things to some people
Give me a nickel, brother can you spare a dime
Money can drive some people out of their minds

Got to have it, I really need it
How many things have I heard you say
Some people really need it
How many things have I heard you say
Got to have it, I really need it

How many things have I heard you say
Lay down, lay down, a woman will lay down
For the love of money
All for the love of money

Don't let, don't let, don't let money rule you
For the love of money
Money can change people sometimes
Don't let, don't let, don't let money fool you
Money can fool people sometimes

People! Don't let money, don't let money change you,
it will keep on changing, changing up your mind".

There are lines in this 1960's song that really should be considered.

"You wanna do things, do things, do things, good things with it"

"People will lie, Lord, they will cheat - for the love of money"

"I know money is the root of all evil - do funny things to some people"

"Got to have it, I really need it"

"Don't let, don't let, don't let money rule you"

"Don't let, don't let, don't let money fool you"

"People! Don't let money, don't let money change you"

 

Most people don't want to do bad things for money or with it.  However, how many of you want to do good things with it?  Giving money to get a tax deduction or giving money because you were invited to a charitable event is not really doing good things if you don't care about the cause.

Thinking about how you plan to use your money to do good things and then executing the plan is right.  Knowing who you're giving the money to and how it will be used for the good of people or animals is right.  Thinking about how you will benefit from giving money for good things is wrong.

Little cheating is cheating.  Stealing a little money from the government on your taxes is stealing money from most of us.  Do you love that money so much you will feel good about stealing a few hundred from the government?  Do you love money so much you will even consider not paying back a loan from a friend or a family member?  Do you love money so much you would lie to a friend to get what he or she worked so hard to get.

Money is only the root of all evil if it makes you evil.  Everybody should prefer to have money.  In a capitalistic system money is freedom of choice.  Being addicted to money will get you to do things that will affect your moral compass.  You will become the kind of person you used to hate.

I hate when people say "got to have it - really need it."  If you're reading this blog you're at least middle class financially.  You don't "got to have it."  You can build a happy and rewarding life without more than you currently have.  Feeling you "got to have more" will never lead to more happiness.  An addiction is something you'll never have enough of.  Once you get more money you'll want even more if you're addicted to it.

Don't let money rule you, fool you or especially change you. I know it's not always fair that some people who don't deserve to have more money, have more.  You're smarter, work harder and deserve more than "them."  However, if you live your life happy while giving positive energy out to the universe you don't have to have as much as them.  Being jealous, angry, frustrated because they have more will mean that happiness is the forgotten ingredient in your life.

You're great just the way you are.  More money will not make you greater.  If the money shows up because you earned it or it was given to you, you will only be happy with the extra money if you appreciate it. You will only be happy with the extra money if you use it for good.  You will only be happy with the extra money if you don't become addicted to it.  You will only be happy with the extra money if you "don't let money change you."

In a previous blog I made this statement:

 

You Will Always Have Enough Money If You're Happy.

You Will Never Have Enough Money If You're Not Happy.

 

 

 

Happiness Is Meeting New People

People like to do things in Packs.  This was and is true in the animal world and the early human era.  Even today we still form Packs with friends and family.  Too many of us don't go outside the Pack to enhance our happiness.

A close Pack is comfortable.  A close Pack makes us feel safe.  A close Pack makes us feel wanted.  A close Pack enables us to show more of ourselves.  A close Pack usually has people in it that view the world politically, religiously and emotionally the same or near the same.  A close Pack takes less effort.

Animals need a close Pack mainly for safety.  Humans don't need a close Pack.  We choose to form or be included in one for the reasons stated above.  That choice limits our knowledge.  That choice limits our understanding of different cultures, religions, politics, etc.  That choice limits us from sharing our emotions and view of the world to all that will listen.  That choice limits our happiness.

Last night I met three new people.  Each of them had very interesting things to say about a variety of subjects.  I learned more new things in a few hours with these people than I've learned from my "pack" in the last two weeks.  They on the other hand got to see me and my views which I believe was interesting to them.

We learned serious information and, once we became comfortable with each other, found many things to laugh about.  I left the bar happier for the experience.  Will I ever see these people again - maybe - maybe not.  That's not the issue.  Having new knowledge and a positive fun experience was the reward.

Happiness is not something given to you.  Happiness is something you have to seek.  Waiting for happiness never works in the long run.  Making an effort to find or create happiness is our job if we want to get the most we deserve out of life. 

Giving positive energy out to the universe and getting positive energy back will make us happy.  Making an effort to meet new people who you can share your knowledge and positive energy and get some of it back is a great way to enhance your happiness.

Some of you will say that too many times meeting new people is boring.  I say, maybe you're not asking the right questions.  Maybe you're not sharing your true emotions and beliefs to the new people you meet.  Maybe you're not listening because those people aren't saying what you want to hear.

A boring party is only so if you make it so.  If you're willing to be "out there" with the crowd, I assure you the party won't be boring and you'll probably meet new people that will enhance your knowledge and happiness.

Showing yourself to people you never met before can be scary, but with no risk there is no reward.  Always ask yourself "what's the worst that can happen?"  I say, the worst that can happen is these new people will never talk to you again.  So what!!  You still have your Pack to go back to.

Letting people see you as you are is fulfilling.  Doing so to only your Pack is reducing your potential for happiness to a handful of people.

Sooo, get your ass out there and go to any place where you have the chance to meet new people.  When you meet them, don't hold back.  Let them have all of you.  Don't do it for them, do it for you.  I promise you and they will have a great time.

Remember, the more you resist the more they will resist.  The more you expose yourself and your beliefs the more they will expose themselves.  This give and get will bring more happiness to everyone.

Ain't No Woman Like The One I Got

By The Four Tops

(Ain't no woman like the one I've got)
(Ain't no woman like the one I've got)
(Ain't no woman like the one I've got)

Every day the sun comes up around her
She can make the birds sing harmony
Every drop of rain is glad it found her
Heaven must have made her just for me
When she smiles so warm and tender
A sight for sore eyes to see

Oooh, (ain't no woman like the one I've got)
Oh, no, they don't come better
(To make her happy doesn't take a lot)
She don't ask for things, no diamond rings
(So together, like a hand in glove)
Like pages in a letter
(Ain't no woman like the one I love)

She can fill me up when it's down I'm goin' (I'm goin')
Put a little music in my day
Wouldn't be surprised if my love keeps growin' (it keeps growin')
Bigger every minute that she stays away

I would kiss the ground she walks on
'Cause it's my word, my word she'll obey, now
Woo-ooh. (Ain't no woman like the one I've got)
Well, I kiss the ground she walks on
(To make her happy doesn't take a lot)
She's a real good friend right to the end
(So together like a hand in glove)
A lonely man when she's gone
(People, ain't no woman like the one I love)

Oooh, what a good, good thing I've got
She means to me a lot

(Ain't no woman like the I've got)
No, no, they don't come better
(To make her happy doesn't take a lot)
She don't ask for things, no diamond rings
(So together, like a hand in glove)
Like pages in a letter
(Ain't no woman like the one I love, people)

(Ain't no woman like the one I've got)
Well, I kiss the ground she walks on
(To make her happy doesn't take a lot)
I'm a lonely man when my baby's gone

Of course I'm talking about my wife. She reads my blogs ya know.  Those of you who know me know my wife.  Those of you who know us know I truly feel what the Four Tops words say.  "I'm the luckiest one you see."

It's hard to be with someone (actually anyone) for almost twenty eight years and still feel lucky.  Your appreciation meter goes way up when you've had two bad marriages, however, there are people who have had many more than two marriages or close relationships and still can't say they're lucky.

What's the trick?  I wish I knew.  If I did I would give it to everyone I come in contact with.  However, I do know a few things. 

One, if you don't know yourself you will never be able to choose the right match. 

Two, if you don't love yourself just a little more than the person in your life, the relationship will eventually crash.

Three, if you're angry, frustrated and full of negative energy, you won't see the good right in front of you.

Fourth, if you choose someone who gives negatives energy out to the universe, don't be upset or surprised if you both wind up hating each other.

Fifth, if you choose someone who likes to laugh, the relationship has a chance.

Sixth, if you choose someone who has family, friends and even past lovers who love the one you chose, now you're on to something.

Seventh, if the two of you can go somewhere together (without any friends or family) for a week and don't fight, this is definitely a good thing.

Lastly, trust your heart.  Does this person make you feel safe?  Does this person make you feel loved?  Does this person want you to get all you can and deserve out of life?  Does this person feel happy when you're happy?  Does this person love you just the way you are?  Do you believe this person will be there for you? 

It took me a long time and many failed relationships to be able to write the list above.  After four years, I used every one of the items on the list to ask Ellen to marry me.  Twenty eight years later "I'm the luckiest one you see" because there:

Ain't No Woman Like The One I Got!

Tragedy In Connecticut

Where do I start?  What now?  Who is to blame?  How can this happen in a civilized society?  What can be done?  Will it ever be fixed?  Should I worry about my Grandchildren?  What should I believe?  Does God have a role in this?  Should I be angry or sad?  Should I be numb or active?  Should I be depressed or hopeful?  Should I cry for the dead or smile for the survivors?

After watching this tragedy unfold this morning, my head is full with all of the above thoughts.  If you don't know what this is all about, you can't be reading this blog.  This is no longer a one off event.  These last six months have been the worst and without some action, this won't stop.

Do I believe this is the straw that breaks the camel's back - I hope so!  However, waiting for the outside world (in this case the government) to fix this is the wrong course.  Taking action, being vigilant and keeping a positive attitude is the right course.

If you believe in gun control - take action.  If you believe our schools, theaters, places of worship and the workplace should make changes - take action.  If you believe in community watch - take action.

Being vigilant takes many forms.  The most important form is being open to the fact that there are troubled people in our society. Being open means you see someone that is not right you get help immediately.  That includes getting help even if it's your own children, family members or friends acting out. 

You know when something or someone is just not right.  However, we hesitate because we're afraid, don't trust our judgment, don't want to get involved or don't want to deal with the fallout from neighbors, friends or family if we're wrong.  I say better be wrong than wait for the tragedy to happen.

There is one critical thing you must do - keep a positive attitude.  Getting depressed, getting angry, worrying, blaming anyone (even God) or crying for the dead is not the answer.  Negative energy will never fix this problem.  Negative energy will not allow you to take action or be vigilant.  Negative energy will bring you down.

There is good in this world.  Good things are happening to you right now even in the wake of this tragedy.  Your thoughts and your prayers (if you're into that thing) are projected to all when you give positive energy out to the universe.

The people who are going through this horrible experience don't need your "woe is me" attitude. 

What they need most is your positive attitude for the future of those who survived.

68 And Loving It

Yesterday was my birthday.  I'm 68 and loving it.  When I was a kid, I believed when I got to be 68 I thought my life would be over.  The family and friends I grew up with seemed old, tired, in poor health and just not loving life. 

Being poor required 68 year olds to keep working in jobs their body was not designed to do.  My grandparents didn't have pensions or Social Security.  They didn't have the medicines or the cures they have today.  Even if they did, they couldn't afford it.  Their friends were in the same boat so they didn't love life either.

Basically their life consisted of work, eat, sleep and taking a shit (which sometimes was the highlight of their day).  They did enjoy their grandkids that were able to put a smile on their face when they visited.

For some seniors today nothing has changed.  However, for many, like me, life at 68 is great and appreciated.  These are my reasons for loving life in my senior years. 

• My stress level is ninety percent less since I retired.  I have much more control of my life.  I can wake up when I want, sleep when I want, work at the things I love doing when I want, say things I truly mean, see the friends and family I want to see, go to Vegas and not be concerned bad things might be happening at work, get drunk when I want, call bullshit on people that make shit up, never have to do things or buy things just to look good to others, not get angry, frustrated or start a fight when things don't go my way or when someone intimates I'm not good enough and best of all, have all morning to take a good crap when the urge calls for it.
• I feel safe.  Medicare and my supplemental pays for all my doctor and hospital bills.  I get great care and don't have to worry I could lose everything do to an illness or injury.  I have a pension, Social Security and some savings.  I will always have food to eat, air to breath and shelter.  I don't have to worry about making ends meet.  I drive a car that's safe not flashy.  I have the time to eat right, work out and generally take care of my health.
• I have great friends and family.  Getting older gets you to appreciate everything more.  That's especially true of friends and family.  My son calls me all the time to check in.  I received Happy Birthday greetings from all my friends and many other people I haven't seen in many years (Facebook rocks).  I'm going to a Bar tonight because friends and even the bartenders want to wish me Happy Birthday.  My wife loves me and I feel her warmth deep into my heart.
• I feel great.  Not so much physically, but mentally.  I not only enjoy every day I wake up, I also have a positive outlook toward the future.  My CEO once said to me that life is a journey not a destination.  I didn't really understand him at that time, but I sure do now.  I'm just loving the journey.

I hope, when you get to 68 you'll appreciate all the things I stated above. Now that I think about it, why wait? 

Why not start today appreciating everything that 68 will feel like when you get there.

Happy Holidays - Happy New Year

It's that time of year we all love and hate.  We love getting time off from work.  We love giving and getting presents.  We love seeing friends and family.  We love seeing other people happy.  We love seeing houses and buildings decorated with holiday lights.  We love the parties and the food.  We love the thought that the New Year will be better than the current year.  We just love the entire experience.

We hate the crowds pushing and shoving in the stores.  We hate the holiday car drivers.  We hate seeing people so poor they can't enjoy the holidays.  We hate listening to people tell of the new year resolutions they will never complete.  We hate the negative energy people who are ba-humbug about the holidays.  We hate the negative energy people who don't believe the New Year will be better than the last.

Happiness IS the forgotten ingredient in life.  If there is ever a time to find happiness in your life, the holidays and the New Year is it.  This is the time to enjoy all you've gotten.  This is the time to enjoy all you've given.  This is the time to enjoy everything that is about to happen.  This is the time to feel good about the New Year.

This happiness can only happen if you decide to make it happen.  That's right, you can decide to make the holidays and the New Year a happy time or a sad time.  You can be positive about all the things you love about the holidays.  You can also be positive about all the things you hate about the holidays.

It's up to you to ignore the pushing crowds, the bad drivers and the annoying negative energy people who don't like the holidays and believe the New Year will not be a happy one. 

The one thing we should not ignore is the poor people who can't enjoy the holidays and the New Year the way we can.  We can give something back to those people.  We can remind ourselves how lucky we are and all we have.  We can:

MAKE THE HOLIDAYS AND THE NEW YEAR THE BEST TIME OF OUR LIVES!