Eau de toilette

As I sprayed on my MAN Eau de toilette by Bulgari I began wondering why am I putting good smelling toilet water on my body?  Am I doing it to attract a woman? That's a big NO because I've already attracted the most fabulous woman in the world, my wife. Am I doing it because I like the smell? I do like the smell, but after fifteen minutes I can't smell it anymore. Am I doing it so I smell good to my friends? Now, I'm getting somewhere. I want to smell good to the people that come close to me especially my friends.

I ware expensive eye glass frames because I want to look good to my friends. I ware good looking clothes so I will look good to my friends. I can't believe I'm just now realizing this. I can't believe I'm doing this. I can't believe that the guy who preaches to never get your happiness from the outside world is spending too much money on toilet water.


My MAN costs $40 for a 3.4 Oz spray bottle. At the drug store Old Spice Classic Sent 4.25 Oz costs $7. The cost to the people who make MAN is the same as the cost to the people who make Old Spice. MAN Eau de toilette is a major rip-off. What price are you paying to smell good to the outside world? I looked up just a few:

* Clive Christian Imperial Majesty Perfume for Men 16.9 Oz Perfume $430,000

* Bond No 9 Wall Street Cologne for Men 3.3 Oz  $235

* Chanel N°5 EAU DE PARFUM CLASSIC BOTTLE SPRAY (6.8 oz.) $205

* Angel Etoile $190


Let me repeat again, the cost to the people who make Clive Christian Imperial Majesty Perfume for Men 16.9 Oz Perfume $430,000 is the same cost to the people who make Old Spice. I know the bottle and the box that Clive Christian comes in is more expensive, but not $423,000 more expensive.

BTW, Angel makes my stomach turn. Years ago I was stuck in an elevator in Spain with a woman who was doused with Angel. I nearly passed out before we got to the 12th floor. Therefore, even if you're spraying on your scent it will not guarantee that the people you are trying to impress won't get dizzy and nauseated by your too much money Eau de toilette.

Even though I know the outside world loves me just the way I am, I'm not going to stop warring my too expensive glasses and I'm not going to stop spraying myself with my too expensive Eau de toilette. However, I now realize that I'm as vain as the next person and I do care about how I look and smell to my friends.

I don't think I'm doing this because I want the outside world to like me more, but I do have to ask myself what would happen if I stopped using MAN? What would happen if I ware frames from Lens Crafters that cost $100 instead of $700? I know the answer is that nothing would change in my life. My happiness Meter would be the same. The people who love me will still love me.

Therefore, I can only assume I'm doing this because "I" like the way I look. "I" like the way I smell. I want to believe I'm doing this for me not for them. OK, that rationalization makes me feel much better so I'm going with it. However, I'm going to keep a check on myself to make sure I'm not doing this because I'm insecure within myself and need the outside world to like me more..

I suggest you all do some self-inspection. If you are truthful with yourself and find out you are spending too much on your smell and too much on the way you look because you want the outside world to like you more you're are going to be low on your happiness meter.

If you find out you're doing this because you're proud of yourself, you like yourself, you're confident in yourself and by spending too much money on the way you look and smell makes you happy,

Then spray away all you want even though you know you're getting ripped off.

Faux Buddhist

I'm a faux Buddhist. There are many elements of Buddhism I accept and respect. However, being a deeply devout Buddhist just doesn't seem realistic to me. To help you understand Buddhism I did my research and focused on those things I believe are the core of what Buddhism is all about. 

The two main goals of Buddhism are getting to know ourselves and learning the Buddha's teachings. To know who we are, we need to understand that we have two natures. One is called our ordinary nature, which is made up of unpleasant feelings such as fear, anger, and jealousy. The other is our true nature, the part of us that is pure, wise, and perfect. In Buddhism, it is called the Buddha nature. The only difference between us and the Buddha is that we have not awakened to our true nature.
BASIC TEACHINGS OF THE BUDDHA
THE THREE UNIVERSAL TRUTHS   1. Nothing is lost in the universe. The first truth is that nothing is lost in the universe. Matter turns into energy, energy turns into matter. A dead leaf turns into soil. A seed sprouts and becomes a new plant. Old solar systems disintegrate and turn into cosmic rays. We are born of our parents, our children are born of us. We are the same as plants, as trees, as other people, as the rain that falls. We consist of that which is around us, we are the same as everything. If we destroy something around us, we destroy ourselves. If we cheat another, we cheat ourselves. Understanding this truth, the Buddha and his disciples never killed any animal.

2. Everything Changes. The second universal truth of the Buddha is that everything is continuously changing. Life is like a river flowing on and on, ever-changing. Sometimes it flows slowly and sometimes swiftly. It is smooth and gentle in some places, but later on snags and rocks crop up out of nowhere. As soon as we think we are safe, something unexpected happens. Once dinosaurs, mammoths, and saber-toothed tigers roamed this earth. They all died out, yet this was not the end of life. Other life forms like smaller mammals appeared, and eventually humans, too. Now we can even see the Earth from space and understand the changes that have taken place on this planet. Our ideas about life also change. People once believed that the world was flat, but now we know that it is round.

3. Law of Cause and Effect The third universal truth explained by the Buddha is that there is continuous changes due to the law of cause and effect. This is the same law of cause and effect found in every modern science textbook. In this way, science and Buddhism are alike. The law of cause and effect is known as karma. Nothing ever happens to us unless we deserve it. We receive exactly what we earn, whether it is good or bad. We are the way we are now due to the things we have done in the past. Our thoughts and actions determine the kind of life we can have. If we do good things, in the future good things will happen to us. If we do bad things, in the future bad things will happen to us. Every moment we create new karma by what we say, do, and think. If we understand this, we do not need to fear karma. It becomes our friend. It teaches us to create a bright future.


As you can see there is a lot to like about Buddhism. I believe most of what's said about "Nothing is lost in the universe." However, the extreme of being a Buddhist by saying we are the same as everything is way out there to me. Yes, from a basic DNA structure we are the same as animals, plants, stars, etc., but we all have different finger prints. We all have different personalities. We all have different upbringings that have shaped who we are and what we are about to become.

We have the power to do good and we have the power to do bad. We have the power to create a happy life and we have the power to live a miserable life. It seems the Buddha is saying we should live our lives as one. In my opinion, that would take the fun out of life.

Lastly, Buddhists don't kill animals. Does that mean that don't eat meat? If everything is the same then they shouldn't eat anything. Taking away my twice a month hamburger doesn't make me happy.  Are pure Buddhists happy - I'm not so sure?

One of the best truths is "If we cheat another, we cheat ourselves." We should all live by that motto.


I like almost everything about truth two "Everything Changes."  Accepting, embracing, and even enjoying the fact that change is going to happen whether we like it or not is the best way to live your life and make yourself happy. Change is a good thing. Change can be an exciting thing. Change can also be a negative thing, however, getting the most out of life is living through the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. Just getting through life is not getting the most out of life.

If you really want to get the most out of life, create change. If you eat Cheerios every morning, go wild and change to Lucky Charms twice a week. Yes, even the little things we change can be interesting and enhance your life and your happiness. Now if you really want to get on this type rope of life, make a big change in your life. You just have to trust yourself enough that the big change will be for the better over time.


Truth three is really why I'm a faux Buddhist. The "Law of Cause and Effect " revolves around this thing called Karma. The Buddha defines Karma as:

"Nothing ever happens to us unless we deserve it. We receive exactly what we earn, whether it is good or bad. We are the way we are now due to the things we have done in the past. Our thoughts and actions determine the kind of life we can have. If we do good things, in the future good things will happen to us. If we do bad things, in the future bad things will happen to us. Every moment we create new karma by what we say, do, and think."

I just have a hard time completely believing in Karma. I wish it were true, but it's not. Bad people have good things happen to them. Doing good things all the time doesn't always guarantee good things will happen back to you. I believe doing good things is a great way to run your life, but believing that because I always do good things my life will be better just doesn't always happen.

Counting on good Karma is a bad life strategy. You're not going to hit the lottery because you have good Karma. You're not going to have fabulous children because you have great Karma. You're not going to have a happy marriage because you have fantastic Karma.

You're going to have a great and happy life because you take the necessary steps to create your happy life. Divorce is not good Karma, but it could create a happier life for you in the future. Start with believing you're good enough, you love and respect yourself and you deserve to be happy. If that's your starting point you have a great chance of creating a happy life.

Counting on Karma to hurt your enemies is just wrong. Counting on Karma to make you a happier person is also wrong.

Karma is YOU. Count on YOU!

  

Your Personal Happiness Meter

I am making an attempt to create a happiness Meter so you can value your happiness level. The Meter goes from 0 (totally unhappy) to 100 (totally happy).  Where do you stand today and how can you raise the level in the future?

0 Meter  I wake up unhappy. I spend the day unhappy. I go to bed unhappy. I truly believe bad things are going to happen to me in the future. I don't sleep well and then I have to wake up again - UGH!!!


20 Meter  I wake up feeling OK, but soon thereafter I have more unhappy experiences than happy experiences. At night I spend most of my time thinking about my bad day and the negative stuff that's going to happen to me in the future. I seem to want to listen to the problems of others. I just don't see a happy future. I have trouble falling asleep because I worry too much about too many things.


40 Meter  I wake up feeling OK and don't think about my happiness level during the day. Even though a few things happen during the day that puts a smile on my face, my general focus are the negative things that are happening to me every day. At night when I talk to my friends, spouse or anyone in listening distance, I tell them about the negative things that have been happening to me. I not only worry about my future, I worry about the future of the people I care about. I sleep OK, but I'm restless.


60 Meter  I wake up feeling OK and enjoy my morning breakfast and newspaper. I don't spend much time thinking about the issues I'm going to have to take care of that day. I look forward to seeing my friends or co-workers. However, if something bad happens that day my mood changes and I either start to worry or just feel unhappy.

I get over that negative feeling in less than an hour and find something positive about the day. At night I do the things that make me happy even if it's only watching a mindless TV program. However, I do get caught up in the negative world when my friends or family throw up their "woe is me" stuff at me. I don't see the future as either positive or negative. I sleep OK.


80 Meter  I wake up feeling good about the day. I try my best to not read about the negative stuff happening around the globe in the morning newspaper or internet. I try eating something new for breakfast at least three times a week.

I have my day somewhat planned, but I leave enough time for shit to happen. If something bad happens during the day I get upset, but only for a few minutes. I really look forward to my day. At night I spend time with the people I enjoy. If one of them should start dumping negative shit on me, I change the subject and tell them the good stuff that's been happen to me.

I see the future as positive, even though I believe there will be some negative stuff I will have to take care of. I worry about some things, but I believe I will overcome any problems that will happen to me. I truly like and respect myself. I pat myself on the back for all I have accomplished in life. I just love life and all the good things it gives me. I give positive energy out to the Universe and the people I meet. I sleep great.


100 Meter   I wake feeling fabulous. I have a smile on my face all day long. Everybody I meet gives me good news and all say they love me. Nothing negative happens to me and I always get what I want. I love life and it loves me back. My future is going to be even better than today. I love to sleep because I always have fantastic dreams.


I give myself a 78. There are still many things in my day and life I could do that will enhance my happiness. What is your Meter reading? If you believe you are at 100 you are currently residing in a rubber room with no doors or windows. If you are less than 60 you really need to read my book ("Happiness The Forgotten Ingredient") and read my weekly blogs. Some of you should get a mentor or therapist to bring your happiness Meter above 60.


Getting happiness is hard work. You'll have to make some tough choices. You might have to give up some things you want, but don't need.

The most important thing about happiness is you have to believe you deserve it

O x y m o r o n s

Is it good if a vacuum cleaner really sucks?

Why is the third hand on a watch called the second hand?
If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Why is bra singular and panties plural?

How come abbreviated is such a long word?

Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?
Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

Why do we say: "I can live with it" when we really don't want to live with it?

Why do we need a legal document when we get married, but don't need a legal document when we say we love and are committed to each other?

Why does a new car only hold its newness for one year and become an old car after one year? Does the word new have a time limit?

Why are we happy when someone we hardly know says we look great and sad when the same person does not acknowledge use? We hardly know this person so why do we give a shit what they say?

Why do we assume a movie is going to stink when all we've seen is the trailer?

Why do we ask a friend if they like your new shoes when we already brought them because we loved the way they looked?

Why do we feel guilty when our kids do something wrong?

Why do we feel guilty when something great happens to us?

Why do we talk about the problems in the world when we're having a happy life right now?

Why do we assume getting older is a problem?

Why do we spend more money than we can afford on stuff when the people who love us don't care if we have costly clothes, fancy cars, lots of bling, etc. etc.?

Why do we hate when we know its negative energy and not going to make us happy?

Is loving your enemy an oxymoron?

Is hating your parents an oxymoron?

 

Is what you're doing or about to do an oxymoron? 

 

 

 

I'm Stressed Out And Loving It

Stress comes from negative energy that you either can't control or you choose not to control. The body sucks the stress in. As more goes in the body sucks even more stress in. this buildup of stress can lead to both mental and physical problems.

Stressed people have a hard time concentrating. Stressed people have a hard time making decisions because they fear that if they should make a bad decision more stress will get sucked in. Stress can put you in a bad mood where even the slightest push on one of your buttons by family or friends will set you off. Stress will cloud your head to a point where you are only capable of focusing on negative energy and not positive energy.

Stress could get you to do something premature (like taking a risk you might normally not want to take) because your body aches so much for relief that it's willing to do something you know you shouldn't do. Stress can get you to shut down your life to a point that you don't have much life left in your body. Stress is a major contributor to depression.

Stress can make you physically ill. It can create an eating disorder. It can give you a heart attack. It can raise your blood pressure to a critical stage. it can get some people to want to commit suicide because they just can't take in any more stress and they don't believe they can get rid of the stress they have. There are a whole host of diseases where stress plays a role.

OK, so now that I have you stressed out, depressed and unhappy, what the hell can you do about it? I'll give you my three things to consider. My favorite one is number three:

1. Get a lobotomy. That's right: most of the stress you suck in goes to the frontal cortex. Either by electric shock or by partial removal of the cortex can reduce or even eliminate stress. However, there are major downsides and I don't recommend it unless you have one foot off the 54th floor of a building.
2. Do everything possible to get to the source of the stress and change it.  Easy to say, hard to do. Your job makes you very stressed so quit and find one that is less stressful (even if it pays less money). Again easy to say hard to implement. Your ego might get into the way. The money may make the whole family lower their standards.
   
   Your spouse is making you all stressed out. So, get a divorce. Again easy to say, hard to implement. There are kids, dogs, family, friends involved. Initially, the divorce will create more stress, but if you just can't take it anymore, the divorce will reduce the stress in the future.
   
   You're stressed out because you fear your book, painting, business plan, etc. will not be accepted and you will be a failure. Controlling this fear is hard. The only way you can relieve this stress is if you love yourself and truly believe you are a good person. Rejection by the outside world is less stressful if you believe you have the power to fix the problem and your next project will be even better.
3. Love your stress. Embrace your stress. Feel good that by having stress you are get a lot out of life. Turn the situation around and let the stress fuel your happiness. Your job makes you stressed out because you don't have control of everything. Love that stress because by not having control of everything is a big relief. Focus on the little tasks that you do a great job doing and put a smile on your face. Let someone else stress over the other more stressful tasks.
   
   Your spouse makes you stressed out so why not embrace that stress. Take a step back and let the waves of stress flow through your hair rather than getting sucked into your body. Your spouse is not going to change, so you change. If she is pushing your buttons, get rid of those buttons. When the stress starts to come at you, pull a Matrix movie move and lean in the opposite direction of where the stress is coming from.
   
   "The more you resist the more they will insist" Kenny Felderstein. Stop resisting. Enjoy the stress because it's not about you it's about the person throwing the stress at you.
   
   Stress from the fear of failing is fabulous stress. See the stress a exciting. See the stress as exhilarating. You created a book, picture or business plan. That's exciting. You love what you created. That's happiness. The fact that some might not like what you've done should not be stressful it should be rewarding knowing that you will do better next time.

I love choice three because you are making something good out of something bad. You are all stressed out and loving it. Happiness is not being stress free. Happiness is laughing through the stress. You will be shocked as to how the outside world will react to your stress love fest.

I promise you (because I've lived it) the more you embrace stress, the more you laugh in the face of stress, the happier you will become and the less stressful the people who are creating the stress will become..  

When Was The Last Time You Pulled Down Your Pants

When I was little my mother would towel dry me after a bath and then play a game with me trying to get my clothes on. I would run naked around the house while my mother was chasing me all over. I was hysterical laughing, my mother was laughing so hard she could hardly catch her breath and even my sister thought it was funny. We always played this game after my weekly bath. It was great fun and being nude mad it that much more fun.

At fifteen I was hitchhiking from Philadelphia to Atlantic City. Three young guys in a beat up old Chevy picked me up. They were drinking beer and laughing about the most stupid stuff anyone could image. On the road an old couple came up behind our Chevy. Two of the guys started making faces and giving the old couple the figure. The driver slowed the car down so the old couple was almost on top of us. It was a single lane road so the couple was trapped.

Being young and stupid and wanting to show off for my new friends, I pulled down my pants and underpants and pressed my ass up against the car's back window. Back then we called this action "Pressed Ham." The old couple couldn't control their laughter and almost ran off the road.

I was exhilarated and the guys in the car were laughing so hard one spilled his beer. It took me 10 minutes to come down from the natural high I got from Pressing The Ham.  When the road changed to a two lane highway, the old couple drove past us laughing as the old man gave us the figure and the old woman pushed her breasts out the window (she had her bra on).  I guess we all got a special moment of fun that is instilled into our memory.

At twenty two my first wife and I were at a Halloween party. It was in the basement of someone's house. I knew about 60% of the people at the party. My wife was dressed as little orphan Annie. I was dressed as Mighty Mouse.

The party was fine. Not very exciting, but had great food. For reasons to this day I don't know why, I decided to shock the crowd.  My wife was sitting at the top of the stair case that led down to the basement. From the top of the stairs I jumped the six steps into the center of the basement. When I got there I yelled the Mighty Mouse slogan; "Here I Come To Save The Day."

Everyone laughed, but then I ripped off all my cloths and danced around the center of the room which felt like an hour, but was only 60 seconds. The crowd was astonished and my shocked wife slipped down four steps as I ran to the small bathroom at the end of the basement. While in the bathroom I was hyperventilating, laughing, exhilarated and high as a kite.

It took me five minutes to calm down enough so I could put on my Mighty Mouse costume. I left the bathroom to the fantastic applause from everyone in the room except my wife. Now you know why that marriage didn't work out.

Three years ago I was at a party with a bunch of friends. Their parties were always the best. Great food and lots of wine, champagne and booze. We would all sing the oldies trying our best to harmonize. We stunk and that made it that much more fun.

I was three sheets to the wind when (for no reason I can comprehend) I pulled down my pants and shorts and mooned everyone in the room. All I remember was laughter and flashes from everyone's cell phones. At 65 it wasn't a pretty site, but it did get everyone laughing with a picture in their head they will never forget. My wife Ellen wasn't shocked because she knew me all too well. That is why we will be together forever.

I've always said when asked how I value my life: "I value my life by the number of times I laugh."

Sooo, pull down your pants, Press The Ham, do something nobody expects you to do and laugh your ass off. Trust me it is exhilarating. It is the best high you can get without taking any drugs. I will be something you and everybody who sees the event will remember for the rest of their lives.

Most times you get a little more out of life by doing something wild and crazy. Jumping out of a plane is exhilarating. Bungee jumping 300 feet is exhilarating. Driving a formula one sports car 200 Miles per hour is exhilarating. The problem with these events is they can get you killed and they are more personal than group related.

Sooo, pull down your pants. It's safer. It's crowd pleasing. It's memorable and it's a great way to enhance your happiness 

Happiness Quiz Kenny’s Results

 

 

Kenny’s quiz score 42 points.  This was harder that I thought. My number does not affect your number.  You don’t have to agree with me as long as the questions you choose bring happiness into your life.

 

Below are my choices and why I chose them.

 

 

Let me start out by saying there are no right or wrong answers to this quiz.  The most important part in taking this quiz is to consider your answers, make sure they are your answers, make sure you aren't choosing answers because you think that is the answer I would have picked and make sure you aren't choosing answers because you think others would approve of your answers.

 

The bottom line is to choose answers that you truly believe make you happy. When done, add up your score points. My blog after this one will give you my score and take you through my reasons for making the selections I chose.

 

This is a have fun effort, don't make it too serious.  Just enjoy the process.

 

There are just two choices in each section. The first choice gets one point if you choose the second choice it counts two points. More points is not the goal. Less points is not the goal. They are just points that get totaled at the end of the quiz.

 

 

1.    Are you happy making $100K a year

2.    Would you prefer to make $150K a year

There has to be something weird going on in your head if you rather make $100K/year instead of $150k

 

1.    Would you prefer to have a job you like that makes $100K per year

After taxes it just is not worth the extra $50K if you are going to be less happy in your job.

2.    Would prefer to have a job that isn't as much fun, but pays you $150K per year

 

1.    Do you live in a place that makes you happy

I can afford a bigger place, but I love my current place and I have money left over to go to Vegas 7 times a year. That makes me happy

2.    Do you live in a place with a lot of space, but not in the neighborhood you would prefer

 

1.    Do you like to hug and get hugged

I’m big on hugging. Showing my emotions via a great hug with someone I care for makes me happy. If I get hugged back that the cherry on the cake

2.    Do you prefer to avoid all this hugging stuff as long as you know your friends like you

 

1.    Do you change your car every three years or less

2.    Do you keep your car as long as it rides great and look good

I have a nice inexpensive car that gets me where I want to go with great gas millage. I just don’t believe I’ll be any happier if I spend twice or three times as much for a car

 

1.    Does your car have some other meaning to you other than getting you from place to place

2.    Is your car all about comfort and reliability

Comfort and reliability is my focus when buying a car. The car itself has very little meaning to me other that I can trust it will get me to where I want to go. I’ve tried the other approach with bad results (see my blog called “Beauty Is Only Skin Deep.”)

 

1.    Will you sacrifice savings and other things to have a home (apartment) or car that makes you feel good when others visit or ride in your car

2.    Do you stay in a home (apartment) and drive a car you can afford and still have a little more left to do other things

I believe the people who come to visit me or ride in my car are doing so because they want to be with me. I’m the prize not my home or car.

 

1.    Do you like having lots of friends and acquaintances

2.    Would you prefer to focus only on the friends that you know care for you

I love meeting new people and enjoying their company, however “friend” has a deeper meaning to me. I want to be with people I can share my life with not just talk about who won the basketball game. Acquaintances are interesting and their view of life is interesting, but they are just acquaintances not true friends

 

1.    When asked, do you always say what you want

It took me 40 years before I realized I can control my happiness by asking for what I want. Putting all decisions into someone else’s control is not going to always make me happy. Asking for what I want is the path to happiness. I’m sure I won’t always get what I ask for, but I took the time to think about what I want and let the people who are asking know what I want.  Remember “asking” is not “demanding.”

2.    Would you prefer someone else make the minor decisions

 

1.    When you get angry with someone or yourself does it last more than a week

2.    When you get angry with someone or yourself does it last less than two days

Again it took me 40 years to realize life is short and holding on to anger, frustration or resentment will never lead to my happiness. The faster I get over it the sooner happiness puts a smile on my face. Being right is a bad excuse to hold on to anger.

 

1.    Do you like yourself just the way you are

2.    Are you willing to take action, risk, change to correct the things you don't like about yourself

Although I do like myself the way I am, I realize I still have things to work on. Fixing those things builds even more happiness in my life. Life is a journey not a destination. Learning and growing enhances the journey.

 

1.    Do you really believe that by giving positive energy out to the Universe, you will eventually get positive energy back

I truly believe giving positive energy out to the Universe will bring me more happiness.  This is not a religious thing. The Universe is not GOD. The Universe is the world we live in. When I give something positive to a friend who is not happy, I truly believe my positive energy will eventually help that friend find happiness. If they do find that happiness, I become even more happy

2.    Do you believe that the Universe has no effect on your life and happiness

 

1.    Do you believe in a supreme being having a hand in your life and happiness

2.    Do you believe you have control of your happiness and believing in a supreme being won't change anything

This is a touchy subject for some. I truly believe that believing a supreme being who I can’t see, touch, smell, etc. has control of my happiness is just not true. When things are going badly, saying: “It’s GOD’s will,” is anti-happiness. Praying to a supreme being with the hope she will fix the problems in your life is anti-happiness. Believing in faith is anti-happiness.  I realize my words won’t sit well with some of you, but the more you count on the outside world making you happy the harder it will be to find the happiness you deserve. Read my Blog “Is It Faith Or Does Shit Just Happen.”

 

1.    Are you willing to give up your lifestyle and maybe lose some friends and family to create the happiness you have been missing

I did and it eventually worked out well for me. I did go through a long rough patch, but it worked out for the better not just for me, but the other people involved. One thing I was sure of was that if I didn’t make these changes I wouldn’t be writing about happiness today.

2.    Do you believe you don't have control of your happiness and therefore why give up anything to get the happiness you are missing

 

1.    If you believed divorcing a spouse or a friend would enhance your happiness would you do it.

I did it twice and now I’m your happiness blogger. These are very tough decisions in anyone’s life. Don’t make a knee jerk reaction to any one event. Think it through. Try to do everything you can to fix the situation. However, your body will know when enough is enough. When it does, have the guts to make the necessary change for your happiness. Remember: “If you make more right decisions than wrong decisions in life you will be a happier person. However, NO decision IS a wrong decision.

2.    Do you prefer to live with a spouse or friend even if they make you unhappy because you hope they will change in the future

 

1.     Are you excited as to what the future will bring

I am excited about the future. I look forward to the future. I believe the future will bring a lot of fantastic new things that will enrich my life. My only problem with dying is that I won’t get to see it all.

2.    Do you believe the future will possibility bring bad news

 

1.    Is security happiness

2.    Is happiness, happiness

Security is happiness, but it is only one bite of the apple. Happiness involves many, many things that you have control of. Therefore, when you are happy, happiness is happiness.

 

1.    Do you make contributions because you believe it's the right thing to do and it makes you feel good

2.    Do you only make contributions to charities you have a passion for

Just giving to lower your taxes or because a friend asked you to give or the person at the supermarket asked you to give or the person ringing a bell outside a store asking you to give is not happiness. Happiness is giving to someone or some group you truly believe will effect change. Being involved (your personal time) in that person or group’s work will bring you even more happiness than just giving money.

 

1.    Do you give money to people that hang out on street corners asking for money

2.    Do you ignore these people

YES. Sorry to be so cold, but I grew up with nothing. Having food to eat, air to breathe and shelter was all I need to sustain me. Unless these people are mentally ill, they can have food to eat, air to breathe and shelter if they want it. It’s just easier to beg for it than work for it.

 

1.    Do you wake up with a positive attitude toward the day to come

Again it took me 40 years to see the world this way. I was so caught up in the problems the new day was going to bring; I didn’t take the time to think about all the good things today would bring. If it turned out that the only thing that was going to make me happy that day was lunch, my first thought when I woke up was the great hamburger I was going to have that day.

2.    Do you wake up thinking about all the things you have to get done that day

 

1.    With all is ups and downs do you still love life and want to live as long as you can

Life is amazing. Life is unpredictable. Life is scary. Life is rewarding. Having the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat is you living life. Not being out there to see and feel the ups and downs is not getting the most out of life. Not getting the most out of life is not getting the happiness you deserve.

2.    Would you prefer to limit your life so it won't get to scary and complex and by doing so you feel you will live much longer

 

1.    Do you really care what the outside world thinks about you and your choices in life

NO I don’t. It took me 40 years to say those words. I believe the outside world wants me in their life. I make them happy. I don’t need them telling me I’m good enough because I now believe I am good enough. I expect the outside world to love me just the way I am because just the way I am is pretty dam great.

2.    Would you prefer the outside world accept, love and respect you

 

1.    Does the way the outside world treats you have a significant effect on your happiness

2.    Can you love, respect and accept who you are even if the outside world thinks you're screwing up your life

Everyone likes to be loved. Should the outside world give you that love and respect that is a bonus not a requirement. If you don’t love and respect yourself the outside world will notice and that will just make it harder for you to find happiness. You are in control of your love of life, love of yourself, trust of yourself and respect of yourself. The outside world is going to do what it needs to do. You can’t control what it will do, but you can control what you do.

 

1.    Are you willing to love yourself just a little more than anything or anybody else in this whole world

Again this took me 40 years to accomplish. I truly believe that when I love myself just a little more than anything or anyone else I have so much more to give the ones I’m putting in second position. The people I want to be with get happy when they feel my love and happiness. Putting yourself in second position, loving others instead of yourself will eventually create resentment. You’ll always feel you are giving more than you are getting. It is not selfish when your spouse asks you which steak you want and you say the best one because I deserve it.

2.    Do you believe that if you love yourself just a little more than everybody else you are being selfish

 

1.    Can you accept a job you hate because it gives you other resources to do the things that makes you happy after work

I have always said that job is either the end or a means to an end. Seeing your job as a trap you can’t get out of. Seeing your job as something that sucks the happiness out of you is never going to lead you to happiness. If you are one of the lucky ones that have a job you love, that great. If you are someone who has a job you don’t like, focus on the fact it is a means to an end. That end might be the money it gives you to be able to do the things out of work that make you happy. That end might be the learning you are getting that will allow you to get a better happier job in the future. Only focusing on the negative of that job will hold you back. See this unhappy job as a stepping stone to your future happiness. By doing so, you will spend your day at the lousy job with a smile on your face.

2.    Is your dislike for you job so much that you have accepted being angry and frustrated about it rather than take the risk to quit.

 

1.    Does drinking and/or doing drugs make you happy

I’m already happy. Having my glass of scotch at 5pm is my reward for the day. I don’t abuse it – I just enjoy it. I don’t have to have it to be happy because I’m already happy. It’s just one more happiness thing that enriches my life.

2.    Does drinking and /or doing drugs remind you about how unhappy you are

 

1.    Do you worry about your health to a point that you stay on a diet you don't like or give up doing anything fun that might negatively affect your body

This was a tough choice. I do care about my health and am willing to make sacrifices to keep a sound mind and body. Am I nuts about it – no. But, I do believe that a good diet and exercise will not only let me live longer, but I will live longer with a good quality of life.

2.    Do you disregard your body to a point that you don't care what you eat, don't exercise and believe nothing really bad is going to happen to you

 

1.    Are you willing to give something back to your body and mind so you will have the best quality of life you can get

YES, I work out four times a week. I eat a healthy diet. Do I cheat on my diet – absolutely. However, my goal is not just longevity it’s the quality of the years I have on this earth.

2.    Do you believe no matter what you do to your body or mind will not change your lifeline 

 

1.    Do you believe this quiz is bullshit and has no impact on your happiness

2.    Do you believe this quiz is something to consider on how you run your life and control your happiness

I wrote the quiz so I would be very stupid to say I don’t believe the answers to these questions could have a profound effect on people’s happiness.

 

Remember, happiness is the goal of this quiz and the goal of your life