The Truth Will Set You Free

 The Truth Will Set You Free

Why is it so hard for some people to tell the truth? Here is my list:

1.  Someone will think badly of me if I tell them the truth, because the truth about me isn't that good

2.  I don't want to hurt someone's feelings

3.  I don't want the IRS to take my money

4.  I'm afraid that telling the truth will get me in trouble

5. Making up a story is fun and people will like me more

6. I don't believe The Truth Will Set You Free

Let's take a look at these reasons:

1.  If you're a really bad person, I understand why you don't want to tell the truth about yourself. However, I want to believe the people reading this blog are not bad people. They might be people that are not happy with themselves and/or their accomplishments. 

They might be people that believe others will judge them badly. I say, forget your insecurities and remind yourself that the people who love you, love you just the way you are. The ones that don't, get rid of them in your life.

2. If you think that telling the truth to someone will hurt their feelings, change the subject. But, remember words are not the only thing that will show your truth. Your face and body language will tell them your truth. I believe it hurts others more if you don't tell them the truth when they know you're lying. 

I always tell the truth. The people in my life expect that of me. It would hurt them more if I made shit up. Remember what My Ellen sometimes said when I would tell her that dress you bought doesn't look good on you - her response was fuck you, I like it. Stop taking others truth so personally. It's your truth that counts.

3.  Not telling the truth to get what you want is cheating. Not telling the truth for personal gain chips away at your moral compass. It leads to having to tell more untruths and more untruths and eventually you become someone who lies all the time. Nobody likes or trusts a liar.

4. If you think that telling the truth will get you in trouble, then you must have done something bad. How about never doing anything bad. How about being a good person - wow, what a concept.

5. Making shit up will come back to bite you back. People will see through your bullshit. It won't be fun when they call you on your bullshit.

6.  If you don't believe the truth will set you free, you're wrong. Say to yourself, what's the worst that can happen to me if I tell the truth. They can't send you to North Korea. Please believe me, telling the truth means you believe:

The Truth Will Set You Free

Thanksgiving 2

 Thanksgiving 2

A few years ago, I wrote a blog called "Thanksgiving - It's Not About The Turkey." I read it again and it still rings home with me and I hope it rings home with you. This is today's edited version.

Thanksgiving - It's Not About The Turkey

 

 

Thanks for the times you have given me

 

Thanks for my health even though I ache all over

 

Thanks for the friends and cousins who wish me well, have been there for me through Ellen's death and want me to be happy

 

Thanks for letting me turn 78 soon with my brain intact even though I have CRS (Can't Remember Shit)

 

Thanks for the next 17 years (November 11 (11/11) 2038) I plan to enjoy with all my heart

 

Thanks for my beautiful (both inside and outside) wife Ellen who always had me feel mighty, mighty real and my new love Joyce who gives me joy and happiness every day

 

Thanks for a dad who taught me about the importance of hard work, never to lie and a strong moral compass

 

Thanks for a dad who gave me a bright brain and a wonderful sense of humor even though he also gave me bad bumpers (bad back, bad spine). It was a great tradeoff - thanks dad 

 

Thanks for a mom who loved and hugged me all the time.

 

Thanks for a mom who taught me to be tolerant to every race, religion and sexual orientation

 

Thanks for the money I've made that has enabled me to have choices in our American way of life

 

Thanks for Bob who got me to believe I was in control of my happiness and could choose happiness over negativism

 

Thanks for me because since 40 years old I've been making all the right choices

 

Thanks for me because I love what I've become

 

Thanks for the people around the world who read my blogs and my books because it makes me feel valued

 

Thanks for my mentored clients who have enhanced their happiness because of something I gave to them

 

Thanks to all the people who give positive energy out to the Universe so they and the rest of us could have a better life

 

Thanks to America for giving me and most others a chance to create a better life

 

Thanks to all the people around the world who believe love, tolerance and freedom will win out over totalitarianism and terrorism

 

 

To all of you on this wonderful holiday;

 

Focus on the things to be thankful for and not the turkey

Tom Brady

 Tom Brady

Tom Brady is in Munich because his NFL Tampa Buccaneers are play the Seattle Seahawks in an NFL International football game Sunday. Yesterday morning I watched an interview with Tom where he said: "Your Whole Life Is Made Up Of Memories And Experiences." I found that to be profound.

Just take time someday (why not today), to think about all your memories. Not just the good ones, but also the bad ones. As being the person that always says to you to focus on positive energy not negative energy, why do I suggest you think about the bad ones? It's because most of you have recovered from the bad ones. That recovery, has helped you to become the person you are today.

Those positive (maybe even wonderful) memories are the ones you should hold on to each day. If you have a bad day, take time to remember those wonderful memories. If you do so, your bad day will get much better - I promise you. Your positive memories have also helped you to become the person you are today.

Life's experiences have even a greater effect on who you are today. If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, pat yourself on your back for all the positives experiences you've had in your life. To experience the love someone gave you, to experience the positive decisions you've made, to experience the joy in someone else's life because of something you said or have done, to focus on the accomplishes you have accomplished will enable you to put more positive energy into your life - I guarantee it.

How can I guarantee you will be a happier person if you do what I suggest, because I'm living proof. My focus on my wonderful memories and positive experiences have made me the person I am today. No longer focusing on my bad and sometimes horrible memories and experiences, has helped me overcome sadness and changed it to happiness.

Sooo, remember,

 "Your Whole Life Is Made Up Of Memories And Experiences." Choose the ones that make you happy.

Look At What Is There Not What You Want To Be There

 Look At What Is There Not What You Want To Be There

I just watched a great movie called: "Enora Holmes." She is the 16 year old cousin of Sherlock. obliviously the movie is a "who-done-it." The line in the movie: "Look At What Is There Not What You Want To Be There," got me thinking.

In business, I always focused on what's in front of me. However, in my social life I was more focused on what I wanted things to be. In business, I made a mock-up of a tome stone with the words "focus or perish" and gave it to all my sales people. In my social life, I wasn't focused on what was happening to me now because what was happening to me now sucked.

What I should have been focused on then was what I could do now to make me happy. It took me many, many years to take control of my happiness via changing jobs, divorce, getting rid of negative friends and getting rid of negative energy within me.

Some people want to live in a fantasy world. My sister hatted her life. Instead of accepting what's happening for now and do whatever she could do to make her happy, she turned to alcohol. I had the same problem and instead of accepting the now and making changes, I became a workaholic. 

For the past thirty years, I've learned to only do things that make me happy. Some of those things were and are hard. There can be consequences when you focus on your happiness, but it's well worth it. Sooo, I say, make yourself a plaque that says;

Is What I'm Doing Or About To Do Going To Make Me Happy

Have I Found The Right One

 Have I Found The Right One

If you're reading my blogs, you know that since My Ellen died, I've been looking for that right one. It's been a struggle with many "no-ways." A month ago, I started dating someone, and we agreed to give it a shot.

When you're meeting someone who you look at as a potential long lasting loving relationship, the first thing you must feel is a connection. Call it physical attraction or just something you feel but can't explain why.

If it's only a physical attraction, IMHO, it won't last long. If it's something you feel, you then have to find out what else is inside that person that might allow the relationship to ferment. So, let me tell you what I learned about this lady and why we are giving this the old college try.

It was obvious from the start that I felt something I can't explain. After a few dates and talking in-between, I realized she was bright (I really like bright women). Our politics are on the same page. We feel the same about religion. We feel the same about what's happening in this country and around the world.

After a few more dates and conversation via phone, we are letting down our barriers and telling each other the good and the bad of our lives. We realize we can talk about everything and trust each other will keep it within our relationship. We also realize we are two people that care. Oh, I forgot to say, we love animals (she has two).

Will we meet our relationship goals - I have no idea. It's only a month. We haven't traveled with each other. You can learn a lot about someone when you travel together. We agree on what we're looking for in love making, but we haven't slept with each other and probably won't until we know each other better.

Most important is, she makes me happy.

Sooo, why am I telling you all this. It's because, I want you to look at your relationship. I want you to consider what makes you happy in your relationship. If you're looking for that special one, don't make it about the physical attraction only. Don't compromise on the must haves in the relationship. The bottom line,

Does she or he make you happy.