Bitch - Bitch - Bitch

How many people do you know that live to complain? Some don't just complain about themselves - they complain about others. "I can't do this because my mother's sick." "My boyfriend never takes me to nice places." "Those road workers never get anything done." My friends never do what I want to do." "That bar always gives me a short pour on my vodka." Etc., Etc., Etc.

As we get older we have more things that goes wrong with our body. When you're not feeling good do you complain to yourself and others? When you have mental stress from work, friends, spouse, family and/or finances do you complain to yourself and others?  If you do complain about these things, do you believe that by complaining your physical and/or mental problems will go away? If you think the answer is "yes," you are just kidding yourself.

When you get home after work and meet your spouse, friend or family what is the first thing out of your mouth? "My boss is a pain in the ass." "I hate my job." I'm so tired I don't feel like doing anything."

When you go out to eat with your friends, which one of them rarely has something positive to say? In your view, is that person a happy person? When they barf up their negative shit on you do you chime in with your negative shit or do you say something positive? When they wallow in their problems do you say to them: Hay John, stop complaining and tell me something good that happened today?

I truly believe negative energy begets negative energy. Complaining brings you and everyone else down. Complainers are not happy people. It's critical for you to stop complaining as much as possible and/or get rid of the other complainers in your life. If the complainer is a close friend or family or spouse you have to do three things:

• Never complain with them
• Remind them that complaining is not only bad for their happiness it is also bad for their health. That's right, constant complaining has a significant effect on mental and physical health.
• When they complain about something change the subject. If they complain about the new subject, change the subject again. If they complain about the new, new subject, get up and leave. After leaving, go somewhere where positive people exist.

You really do have control of your happiness. You can decide that complaining is not making you feel better and not enriching your happiness. You have the power to stay away from the constant complainers. You have the power to tell the complainers to stop complaining for the good of their health and happiness. You have the power to say something positive even if you are physically hurt or sick. You have the power to think about the positives things in your life even if you are under stress.

Saying you just want to get these problems off your chest never works. After getting it off your chest what happens next? Is it a big release and the problem goes away or is it a very short release and a few minutes later you're still dealing with the problem. If you focus your energy on saying something positive you have a much better chance of minimizing the length of time it takes to get over your problem.

People like to hang out with other people who rarely complain. People like to hang out with other people who have a positive outlook on life and who truly believe their problems are just a moment in time with better times coming in the future. People like to hang out with other people who help them get over their problems by being positive.

Bitch- Bitch - Bitch if you must, but just don't do it around me!

"Days Like This"

 

by Van Morrison

 

When it's not always raining

When there's no one complaining
there'll be days like this
Everything falls into place
like the flick of a switch
Well my momma told me
there'll be days like this

When you don't need to worry
there'll be days like this
When no one's in a hurry
there'll be days like this
When you don't get betrayed
by that old Judas kiss
Oh my momma told me
there'll be days like this

When you don't need an answer
there'll be days like this
When you don't meet a chancer
there'll be days like this
When all the parts of the puzzle
start to look like they fit
Then I must remember
there'll be days like this

 

When everyone is upfront
and they're not playing tricks
When you don't have no freeloaders
out to get their kicks
When it's nobody's business
the way that you wanna live
I just have to remember
there'll be days like this

When no one steps on my dreams
there'll be days like this
When people understand what I mean
there'll be days like this
When you bring out the changes
of how everything is
Well my momma told me
there'll be days like this

 

What a fabulous song by Van Morrison. You really have to go out (or download) and get the entire album. The reason this song hits home for me is because my momma did tell me there would be days like this.  Other than a few years here and there, it took me until the age of 62 to consistently have days like this. I wish it happened sooner, but better later than never.

 

Our happiness meter goes way up when we have days like this. They may not happen as often as we like so we have to step back and appreciate when they do. The more you appreciate life the happier you become. The happier you become the easier it is to appreciate everything. The more you appreciate and the happier you become the more "days like this" you will get.

 

Each line in this song has real power. "When it's not always raining" is a great day especially if you live in Seattle.

 

"When there's no one complaining" is a day we all wish for. Complaining is negative energy. It's not healthy to complain. It's not healthy to hang around people who always complain. Too many people view complaining as getting something off their chest. The fact is by complaining you're pushing unhappiness on yourself and others.

I know your foot hurts or your neighbor through trash on your property or a friend said something you don't like or your stomach is upset, but complaining about it will not change anything and therefore is not going to enhance your happiness. Saying positive things even when you have every right to complain is the way to enhance your happiness.

 

 "Everything falls into place like the flick of a switch" is a day that needs major appreciation. It happens more than you believe it does. The issue is we don't take the time to make a big smile on our face when it does. Remember, smiling creates positive energy endorphins in your brain which makes you happier.

 

"When you don't need an answer" now that's a great day. We are trapped into believing we have to have an answer for everything. We use the word closure. Why do we need closure for everything? What will happen if you don't get closure? The answer is simple - nothing that will impact your happiness in a negative way will happen if you don't get closure. Sooo, stop looking for answers to everything. Just sit back a enjoy a day without any answers.

"When it's nobody's business the way that you wanna live" is a powerful line. You are an adult. You are making your own decisions. You are deciding how you want to live your life. Sure you'll make mistakes, but you have the control to fix them. You are smart enough to change any mistake you may make. What's it their business on how you decide to run your life. The answer is - it not their business unless you allow them to make it their business. What a great happy day it is when nobody is telling you what to do, how to change or how to live.

"When no one steps on my dreams" is the way I want to live. Dreams are positive energy. Even if you don't act on them, they will make you happy by just have them. Believing that there is no sense in having dreams because they will never come true is negative energy. Dream away. Some might be practical enough that you're willing to take the time and the risk to implement them. Some might not be practical, but you feel good thinking about them. Either way, having dreams will make you a better person and a happier person.

I didn't use all the fantastic lines in this song so you should read all the words and think about how much better your life will be when you have:

"Days Like This!" 

  

 

 

 

 

 

Health Care

Health care today is more about security than health. The cost of even a minor health problem is so high now that protecting your financial future by having health insurance is critical. I feel so bad for anyone that truly can't afford health insurance. I hope Obamacare lasts in some form after all the budget cuts take place.

Some of us don't feel secure unless we can see the top physicians in their field. Well guess what, top physicians screw up. Top physicians don't have as much time to care for you that a little less experienced physician has. Top physicians won't put you in first place if you're not someone known to the outside world. Top physicians are not security, they are the unnecessary bling on your wrist.

I always say that we should not be controlled by our fear of insecurity. However, it's real hard to feel happy if we are one operation away from losing everything. How much security each of us need is a personal choice. I believe disaster insurance is the least amount we should have.

Disaster insurance to me is insurance against having a major life change that will ruin your happiness. Now comes the catch, what event will ruin your happiness?

If you had a surgery that costs $50,000 would your happiness be destroyed? Probably not because the doctor and hospital will work with you on a payout system you could live with. Yes, you might have to give up your too high priced car. Yes, you may have to cut back on buying things you want, but really don't need. Yes, you might even have to give up your home and live in an apartment. But, none of those events will destroy your happiness.

If you had a medical event that costs $500,000, that could have a major impact on your happiness. If so, that's the minimum medical disaster insurance you should have. I always put medical insurance as a financial priority. My health is much more important to my happiness than fancy clothes, bling, expensive cars, bigger house, etc.

I'm not addicted to security, but I am focused on my health. I do all the right things to give me the best chance of having a healthy life. I eat right, exercise, don't smoke and go to the doctor when I'm not well (physically or mentally).

However, I do eat stuff that tastes good (a fabulous medium rare burger is a must have every few weeks). I exercise, but I'm not addicted to exercise. I don't spend four hours in the gym every day. I don't wait until I'm very sick or hurt to see a doctor. Seeing a doctor before things get worse is practicing preventative medicine. It's what I'm paying the medical insurance for. I know too many friends or relatives that have good insurance and don't use it until they're really ill.

Like me, eventually you will get on Medicare. It is a blessing and the politicians will never (at least in our lifetime) eliminate it. Us seniors have too much voting power. My cost of Medicare, a Supplemental and a Medicare drug program costs me a third of what I was paying for health insurance. Now, I can apply that extra money to happiness stuff.

The entire health industry is too expensive. Waste and profits are out of control. But, that's the world we live in. Complaining about it is the wrong course. Getting the most out of the system is the right course.

The bottom line is happiness. Security, as long as you're not addicted to it, has different needs for each individual. Paying for health insurance to protect your minimum happiness requirements is important. Using the insurance you purchased to give yourself the best chance of a happy and healthy life is critical.

The healthier you are the happier you are. Make your body a priority. Make your health a priority. 

Happiness is loving life in the best body and mind you have control of creating.  

When It's Too Good To Be True - It's Too Good To Be True 

It's that deal you just can't refuse. It's that offer from a friend you just have to say yes to. It's a onetime price that won't be available tomorrow. It's a piece of bling, a trip to someplace special, a beautiful dress, a pair of shoes, a watch or a set of cuff links that is a once in a lifetime item never to be available again. It's an investment from Madoff.

Somehow we convince ourselves the offer is too good to be true and we have to buy it, make it or just have to have it.  99.9 percent of the time too good to be true offers are just that - too good to be true. However, even though we're skeptical, we still have to have it.

As I stated in my blog regarding Madoff, most of the individuals who invested with him had to have a little angel deep inside who said: "I think this investment is too good to be true." However, these individuals also had a little devil inside who pushed them out of greed.

It's that little devil that gets us to be fooled into believing there won't ever be a piece of bling, a piece of clothing or even a special trip somewhere that either can't be repeated, replaced or superior to today's special offer.

The little angel knows that's bullshit. Most offers get repeated. You just have to wait. Many times the repeated offer is better than the original offer. Almost everything you buy can be replaced or you will find something superior in time.

The devil is impatient. He or she has to have it now. The people selling us this snake oil count on it. The people convincing us to invest our hard earned savings into a "too good to be true investment," count on it.  The devil is greedy. He or she doesn't take a step back and think about the consequences. The devil makes us feel we won't be good enough if we don't take the offer. The devil makes us feel we won't be viewed as successful if we don't take the risk that our angel knows is "too good to be true." The devil makes us feel we won't be pretty or handsome enough if we don't buy it NOW.

We all have both an angel and a devil inside of us. Some of us listen to the angel and ignore the devil. Some of us listen to the devil and ignore the angel. I say, listen to both, but make you own decision. If the devil is pushing you to take a risk that is reasonable - take it. If the devil is pushing you to buy something you "need" or something that will put a smile on your face - buy it.

If the angel is asking you to not go so fast or take a step back and think about it before you react - take two deep breaths and think about. If the angel is saying to you that you really don't need that thing - guess what, you really don't need that thing. If the angel reminds you that you really can't afford it right now - don't buy it.  If the angel inside you believes you really won't be more successful, love yourself more or become a happier person if you get it - Just don't do it. If you really listen to your angel, he or she is always telling you that you shouldn't care what the outside world thinks - don't do it for "them." 

Sooo, don't let the devil win when that alarm goes off telling you "it's too good to be true," because you know:

It's Too Good To Be True

Creativity And Happiness

Being creative makes you happy. Too many people think they aren't creative. Too many people don't try to be creative. Too many people believe artists are the only creative people. Too many people don't take the time to appreciate the creative things around them. Too many people don't appreciate the creative things they do each day. Too many people don't take the time to be creative. Too many people have the wrong definition of creativity.

It's easy to see creativity in art, movies and exciting new products. It's harder to see creativity in everyday life.  Building a cabinet is creative. However, figuring out how to get the most out of your toilet paper is also creative.

We are all creative creatures. Yes, some more than others, but we all have the capability to be creative. We all have been and are creative most days. The problem is we either don't take the effort to be creative or we don't step back and appreciate ourselves when we do something creative. Appreciating our creative side makes you happy. 

Too many people don't make an effort to be creative because they don't have confidence, they don't think trying something creative will be good enough, they compare themselves to others who have a higher DNA given talent, they believe that if it isn't going to be perfect it's not worth trying, they don't believe just trying will make them happier and/or they don't get in tune with themselves as to what creative task they would like to work on.

I started out my career in the computer business.  I couldn't speak any foreign languages and wasn't very good at English. However, I could write computer code in seven different computer languages. I flunked Spanish and English, but I was a top notch computer programmer. Writing computer code made me happy, but I didn't think I was being creative.

As I moved up in the business world, I had to communicate to customers, suppliers, managers and executives. Many of my communications were done via overhead slides (wow am I old) and later on in PowerPoint presentations. I was a master at creating presentations that communicated the message I was trying to get across. My co-workers would always tell others: "if you need a presentation, get Kenny to help you - he is a master at shitting slides."  I loved my presentations, but I didn't see them as being creative.

I really enjoyed doing lectures, but when I tried to do so on a bigger stage, I was always asked if I was published. That got me to try to write my first book "Never Buy A Hat If Your Feet Are Cold - Taking Charge Of Your Career And Your Life."  I stunk at English and even after my book was published I didn't see myself as a creative writer. My writing style was and is storytelling not literary art. However, I was so proud of myself for making the effort to write a book.

Now three books later and a new one coming soon, I realize I'm not the best writer in the world, but I love using the creative side of my brain and creating something that makes me happy. It's the creative process that makes me happy not the money, ego, success or any other outside world recognition. I write (or blog) for ME! I would do it even if the words never left the computer I'm writing on.

I stink at playing the guitar, but by using simple cords I can make music. Me making music makes me happy even if I'll never become a great guitarist. I'm left brained. Doing something analytical is easy for me. Using my creative right brain takes much more effort. I take the effort because doing something creative makes me happy (even if the outside world thinks it stinks).

Sooo, here is my suggestion; start out the day doing something creative. Think about creating something interesting for breakfast. If it winds up tasting great, appreciate and be happy with yourself for your creative breakfast. When at work, take a step back and enjoy all the little or big things you did that day that was creative. You'll be shocked at the number of creative things you do each day.

When you get home, think about something you always wanted to do that is creative. If you love art, draw. If you love music, play an instrument. If you like doing things with your hands create something. Do this for YOU. It doesn't matter if it's great. What matters is you tried because doing so makes you happy. 

Happiness is the forgotten ingredient in life. Putting a smile on your face when you do something creative is one way to get all the happiness you deserve.