Time For Clothes Off

Time For Clothes Off

With all the bad stuff going on in the world, I thought it's time for a lighthearted blog. My wife and I watch TV from eight o'clock to ten o'clock (sometimes eleven o'clock) most nights. Even when we go out for dinner or just happy hour, by around seven thirty we look at each other and say; "time for clothes off."

One of the pluses of being seniors is we don't have to stay all night at a boring party or go out drinking until the wee hours of the night. If the party is going great, we stay. If the party sucks - "time for clothes off." If the restaurant is something special, we eat late. If the restaurant is casual or we're going just for happy hour - "time for clothes off."

Now that I'm retired, we don't have to go to any business parties or dinners. However, even when we had to attend business parties or dinners the same rules applied. Good party we stay, bad party - "time for clothes off." Good dinner we stay, bad dinner - "time for clothes off."

What do I mean when I say; "time for clothes off?" It means just that. When we get home we take our clothes off and get into something that we would never wear in public. The clothes are so comfortable we could stay in them for the rest of our lives. No tight waistbands. No tight shirts. No underwear - my boys need to breathe. 

We don't look very sexy, but, since we've been together for twenty nine years, who gives a shit. I get horny for Ellen just looking into her eyes. The knowledge that she's not wearing underwear brings a smile to my one eyed monster. OK, it's not a monster, but would you believe it's a Dodger Dog - OK, would you believe it's a cocktail frank.

What about you? Does your routine include "time for clothes off?" Do you stay at parties that suck because you don't want to hurt the host's feelings? Do you go to dinner with people that are boring because it will enhance your social or business situation? Do you stay up real late with friends because you want to feel young again? Do you and your spouse or friend have a signal that says; "time for clothes off?"

If you say yes to the first four questions, you're not focused on your happiness. If you say yes to the fifth question, you have matured to a level where you've put your happiness in first position.

Here is the most important question; "when you get home, do you take your clothes off and get comfortably ugly? Are you afraid to let your spouse or friend see you with clothes that don't match, but are super comfortable? How do you feel about swing in the wind without underwear? 

Trust me, you'll never really get to know your spouse or friend until you see them ugly. Hugging in comfortable clothes is much better than hugging in party or business clothes. Hugging someone who isn't wearing any underwear is more thrilling than hugging someone who has layers protecting the good stuff. 

Sooo, say it loud and say it proud:

"TIME FOR CLOTHES OFF"