Maturity

Maturity 

One of the things I've learned through my seventy years of living is that maturity can happen at any time. I don't believe I reached my highest level of maturity until forty. My youngest son didn't reach his highest level of maturity until his late thirties. The problem is that reaching maturity is not like a light bulb going on. It happens slowly.

Compared to other ten year old kids, I was very mature. I had to be because I had to help my family pay the bills. I always joked that at thirteen I had a father and son talk with my father - I played the role of father.

Then I found myself married with two children and a management job at Xerox Corporation. I had to "man-up in a hurry. However, inside I was far from mature. I knew my way in business, but I had no idea what I needed to do to mature socially. 

I was insecure. I overreacted to situations that weren't as bad as I made them out to be. I didn't have control of my temper. When someone disagreed with me, I defended my position instead of listening to what the other person was saying.  I was the dog who wouldn't let go of the bone.

As the years went by I became more secure and was able to take criticism and learn from it. If I didn't agree, I stopped defending myself to the death. I just told the other person: "I appreciate your opinion, but I'm going to stay with my decision." 

Getting more maturity helped me become calmer and enabled me to see the social world differently. I would never have been able to marry my love Ellen if I hadn't reached my current level of maturity. I still revert back to my old bad habits, but those times are few and I have no problem saying: "I'm sorry for being a jerk."  

The one thing I learned is that age has nothing to do with maturity. I also learned you go through different levels of maturity throughout your life. Some never reach maturity. Some believe they don't want to get to maturity. Screw being a productive person. I like being a flake. If I get mature, I believe I will feel old. I want to stay young.

This attitude is bullshit. Maturity has nothing to do with being young or old. Feeling young is something inside you. I'm seventy and when I look into the mirror, I ask myself: "who is that old guy in the mirror. I still see myself as a teenage Kenny from South Philly. Maturity has help me to stay young not make me feel older.


Sooo, where are you on the maturity scale. Are you so immature that life is still a struggle? Are you overly mature that you feel old? The best way to judge your situation is am I happy. Being mature should make you happier than being immature. I have found that very immature people aren't as happy. They put on this happy facade, but deep down their still scared little kids.

Mature people have a more solid life and have more control of their happiness. Having control of your happiness should be everyone's goal. Therefore, knowing you're a productive person, knowing you're a person people can count on and knowing where you're going with your life will give you the most important thing in your life:

"Having Control Of Your Happiness"