Word Of The Day - Frustration

One of the definitions of frustration is: "a deep chronic sense or state of insecurity and dissatisfaction arising from unresolved problems or unfulfilled needs."


I found it interesting that Webster relates frustration to insecurity.  After much thought, I can understand it on some level.  What I'm sure of is frustration leads to anger and anger leads to unhappiness.  Therefore, I was going to make this blog about why you should take frustration out of your life.  Simply said: less frustration - more happiness and more frustration - less happiness.


What I didn't plan on writing about was why some people get frustrated.  People who are happy in life don't expect the outside world to make them happy.  People who are unhappy in life are only happy when the outside world gives them what they want.  However, much of the reason some people live via the outside world is because they are insecure.  


When I first went to my mentor, he asked me: "why are you seeing me."  My answer was: "well, if everybody would stop treating me like this, I would not need to see you."  It took me a year to understand why that statement was supporting my frustration with life and making me unhappy.


If you get frustrated when your friends, spouse, family members, boss, co-workers, etc., etc. do things that frustrate you, think about why you are getting frustrated.  You don't want to get frustrated.  You know that being frustrated doesn't make you happy. Soooo, why not just stop getting frustrated?


The answer could be the root of your frustration in the first place.  Nobody wants to admit they are insecure.  They believe that if they are insecure there is something wrong with them.  They believe that if they are insecure they are not good enough.  The facts are that all of us are insecure to some degree.  To some degree our parents were insecure when we were young and they passed it down to us (as their parents passed it down to them).


When someone says to you: "you're insecure," do you get a pain in your gut?  If you do it's because your are insecure.  Do you try to defend yourself if they say: you're insecure?  The more you defend the more insecure you are. The more experience you get the more confidence you get.  The more confidence you get the more secure you get.  Don't hate your insecurity because the more you resist the more your insecurity will insist. Accept the level of insecurity you have and know that you will be more secure in the future. 


Insecurity makes it hard to stop getting frustrated.  People who have no patience get more frustrated than people who have more patience.  Maybe people who have less patience are more insecure.  I'm not sure, but when I was young, I had little patience and was frustrated a lot.  Now, I am much more patient and get frustrated a lot less.  I'm also much more secure within myself than I was when I was younger.


I get more frustrated with myself because I know I can do better.  I get much less frustrated with the outside world because I don't count on them making me happy and I now know that I will recover from anything they throw at me.  My security and confidence in myself has led to a happier life.  After reading the definition of frustration for the first time, I'm a believer that my security and confidence in myself has made me less frustrated in life.


My previous blog(s) deal with insecurity and the affect it has on your happiness.  Please reread them because if you can fix some of your insecurities you will probably be less frustrated.  

Less frustrated - more happiness!!!